Figuring It All Out

Quitting corporate is hands-down the best decision I’ve made in my short, adventure-filled 24 years of life. 

By doing so, I swung open the door to endless possibilities and a world of opportunity. Unlocking the key to fulfillment and happiness along the way: pure, un-biased authenticity. 

Rooting every decision in the soil of my truth. 

There’s no roadmap to individual success—you create it as you go 

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My entire life I’d chased confirmation. Permission, if you will. 

As a child, nothing devastated me more than knowing I’d deviated from my parent’s plans for me. I wrote endless apology notes in my room begging for forgiveness of the smallest offenses (most never made it past my bedroom door). If I had an idea I believed in, I needed confirmation from my parents that they believed in it too before I’d take action. 

I showed my teachers my homework before turning it in—to make sure I was “on the right track.” God forbid I complete something that’s not what they were wanting. 

My friend’s opinions of each minute detail of my life mattered more than the details themselves. 

I did not act without knowing there was an army of people standing behind me nodding their heads in approval. My authenticity was rooted deeply in someone else’s soil. I planted myself in a garden that I wished to be mine but was actually on a completely different planet.

That garden haunted me well into adulthood. Until one day it hit me—I’d never actually grasp happiness until I let go of everyone else’s expectations. 

There was no vacancy in my heart for my own wants and needs because I was too busy filling up rooms with the feeling of pleasing others. But then I did it—I shut the door. I kindly excused everyone’s voices and had a sit-down chat with myself. 

“What do you want? Like really, really want?” 

And the answer was clear. I wanted to take risks. To see every last inch of this magical Earth. To chase down a dream of creating a business that I had no idea how to create. To read as many pages of as many books as humanly possible. To mess up, fall on my butt, and figure it out all over again. To exchange stories and laughter with strangers until each new place felt like home.

And I wanted to do it all because it felt like me. Not because it felt like the version of me everyone wanted to see. 

Sometimes it takes realizing your life is speeding by swiftly with you in the backseat just hanging out before you realize it’s up to you to grasp it, slow it down, savor it, and tell it where to go. Sure, we all need a supportive group of humans to crowd around us and offer their two cents and love, but they’ve got their own lives to direct—show up in yours.

I’ve finally begun to plant my own garden, and let me tell you, it’s the most fulfilling feeling in the world. 

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